Slattsnews

You could read it only in the Top End’s top tabloid.

A NORTHERN Territory woman is convinced a horny ghost is haunting her home.
Jennifer Mills-Young claims the ghost, named Kevin, once tried to drag her out of bed in the middle of the night.

If something is so obviously bad, why waste time and effort recounting its shortcomings?
Is it because propaganda doesn’t work unless it’s repeated ad nauseam?

How can this insignificant, unprepared, vacuous, unworldly, small-town hillbilly generate so much venom and invective from so many self important and sophisticated elitists? Surely, such a loathsome and inept bumpkin cannot be viewed as a political threat to the party in power. Perhaps it is journalistic laziness–when a columnist is bereft of ideas, there is always Sarah Palin to kick.

Beats me. In light of this polling you’d reckon the media’s Obama-backers would be pushing hard for her to be the Republican candidate.

Plenty of “progressives” may hate him, but they can’t deny that when it comes to expressing common sense, no one trumps John Howard.

He said all English-speaking nations and the broader free world should not apologise for their particular identities but firmly reassert them.
“I think one of the errors that some sections of English speaking world have made in the last few decades has been to confuse multiracialism and multiculturalism,” he said.
“I am a passionate believer in mulitiracialism. I believe that societies are enriched if they draw, as my country has done, from all parts of the world on a non-discriminatory basis and contribute, as the United States has done, to the building of a great society.
“But when a nation draws people from other parts of the world, it draws them because of the magnetism of its own culture, and its own way of life.
“The ideal in my opinion is to draw people from the four corners of the earth and unite them behind the common values of the country which has made them welcome, and I think some of the difficulties that the United Kingdom is experiencing, and some of the difficulties that other countries have experienced has been to confuse those two concepts.”

Handy reference for the next time an empy-headed lefty babbles “Howard is a racist”.

I felt like doing the same to that dead-set cert that came nowhere in the last at Moonee Valley.

Prosecutor Sergeant Mark Maligorski said Rioli – cousin of Essendon footballer Dean Rioli – punched police horse Bunda Cocaine with both fists.

Love to know the story behind the nag’s name.

All eyes are on Geelong this week, and not just because of a certain footballer’s planned departure.
The old town is hosting the 2010 UCI Road World Cycling Championships.
Ventured down to Pakington Street this morning to watch them whizz past in the Under 23 men’s time trial.
Later today is the Elite Women’s time trial.

Times have changed:
Brigadier Arnold William Potts led the 21st Brigade of the Second AIF during its fighting withdrawal over the Kokoda Trail described as “one of the most critical triumphs in Australian military history and one that an apathetic nation has still to honour”.

Sir Thomas Charles (“Tom”) Eastick rose to the rank of (temporary) Brigadier, and was military governor of Sarawak in 1945-46.
He also commanded the 2/7th Field Regiment, led it during the North African campaign, including the Battle of El Alamein, and was Mentioned in Despatches on 15 December 1942.

David Whitehead was given command of the 2/32nd Battalion in February 1942 and was promoted to brigadier in September and assumed command of the 26th Brigade. Whitehead led the brigade through the Second Battle of El Alamein during October and November in which it took part in heavy fighting.

Brigadier Lyn McDade, who is prosecuting the court martial of three Australian soldiers for fighting back against terrorist fire, has been a lawyer for 25 years, a relieving Magistrate and Deputy Coroner for the Northern Territory.
She has not been mentioned in despatches.

I’m expecting plenty of sour pusses around the old town today.

GEELONG star Gary Ablett will today announce football’s worst kept secret – that he is leaving the Cats.
In yet another body blow for Geelong, Ablett will tell the football world that he is signing a five-year, $9.5 million deal at the Gold Coast.

Disaster, yet again, visits as a threesome.

It will rock the Cats, who have lost president Frank Costa this week and are likely to lose coach Mark Thompson to burnout.

Ropes holding the new Federal government together are already showing signs of fraying, according to number-cruncher Graham Richardson.

She has already learned that when your numbers are on a knife’s edge, you can’t afford by-elections, and that means you can’t exercise power as easily as you can when the numbers are overwhelming. When she tried to demote one cabinet minister and suggested to another that he should step aside, they both immediately threatened to resign from parliament. Gillard backed off. She had no choice.

To paraphrase Lisa Simpson: Who’s policing the policing of the police in Victoria?

A WOMAN at the centre of sensitive documents uncovered in a police drug raid had the “highest security clearance” at the police watchdog.
ASIO, OPI and files from other intelligence and policing agencies were found in the raids.
The Herald Sun has been told the drug grower’s girlfriend had worked in the intelligence areas of several agencies, including ASIO, the Office of Police Integrity, the West Australian and Victoria police forces and the Victorian Department of Corrections.

To paraphrase Homer Simpson: D’oh, the Coast Guard?
Bet she knew all the politically correct rhetoric necessary to get the nod from her stupid politicised superiors.
Anyone know the way to Keystone?

Sales of comics in the US are in freefall, so I guess publishers will try anything to turn the trend.

Definitive statement on August 16:

Prime Minister Julia Gillard has said there will not be a tax on carbon while she leads the federal government.

Julia Gillard yesterday:

Ms Gillard promised before the election that there would be no carbon tax but said again yesterday that the hung parliament and unanticipated support for a price on carbon from sections of business and industry had created a ”new environment”.

The first great lie of the Gillard government.
I hope she names all these persuasive sections of business and industry that want to see the price of all domestic goods and services soar. As it is, no one from the government or the Greens is denying speculation that power bills alone would double under a carbon tax.
And what for? To reduce Australia’s carbon emissions from 1.5pc of the world total to 1.3pc? Meanwhile, China takes all the resources we can dig up to fuel a growth rate of 10.5pc per annum.
And still, after 25 years of theorising, manmade global warming has yet to make any meaningful impact on the world’s environment. In fact, the only discernable warming can be put down to increased urbanisation and the heat shield it creates. You don’t hear the inner city Greens – Fitzroyals as my son calls them – hyperbolising about that.

AOL is a pretty straight up and down news site, so this should carry a grain of credibility. However, it is published under their Weird News section. If it is true, it should be an interesting news conference.

(Sept. 25) — Former U.S. Air Force officers and a former enlisted man are about to break many years of silence about an alarming series of UFO encounters at nuclear weapons sites — incidents officially kept secret for decades.

UPDATE: Britain’s Daily Mail has reported the news conference:

‘I have no idea what we saw that night but I do know it was under intelligent control. My theory is that it was from another dimension or extra-terrestrial,’ he said.
The six former U.S. Air Force officers and one former enlisted man, all presented declassified information which they claim backs up their findings.
They want US and British authorities to release 60 years worth of ‘X-Files’ they claim proves the existence of extra-terrestrials.

Bloody hell! It’s like dancing with your sister. I’ve taken a week off work, mainly to watch the 2010 World Cycling Championships, but also to join in Collingwood premiership celebrations. Now, Magpies must endure another week of angst and aggravation. It would be nice to sleep for 144 hours.
Lenny Hayes played a damned fine game for the Saints. But anyone who couldn’t see that Brendan Goddard was clearly best on the ground knows jack about footy.

They’ve got some bloody tough men in the Northern Territory. Mark Woods is one of them.

Mr Woods’ wife Robyn has accepted her husband’s hobby of mangling cookware and playing with sharp, heavy objects.
But she has banned a few stunts.
She has drawn the line at blowing up a hot water bottle like a balloon and having someone smash a concrete slab across her husband’s stomach with a sledge hammer while he lies between two chairs.

When I was a kid a bloke named, I think, the Great Young Apollo, travelled the sideshow circuit performing acts of superhuman strength. He’d lie on a bed of nails while an assistant belted a huge rock on his chest with a 28 pound hammer. He also ate chopped up pieces of metal, claiming he aimed to eat a car in a year. Dunno if he ever achieved it.

UPDATE: Found my boyhood hero at this fascinating blog.

Dammit!! What else can a bloke do?

From the Herald Sun’s World’s Strangest Signs gallery

Lisa French of Melbourne expresses the undeniable at Herald Sun Online.

A brilliant opportunity to introduce a journalist who will be objective, neutral and ask the relevant tough questions to either side of politics without bias or prejudice in their interviewing. We no longer watch the 7.30 Report because Kerry O’Brien compromised his work over many years by being so blatantly pro-labour. We found it so disappointing that our tax payer funds which support the ABC were wasted. Mary Delahuntly was of the same pro labour bias. It is about time time the ABC was put on notice that the public demands no less than high quality, objective and unbiased reporting by it’s staff. It is now time for a big change please

That O’Brien and colleagues are allowed to continue to abuse their positions and send a shameful message to younger aspirants is justification enough to sell off the whole dodgy ABC empire and let it fight for survival in the market place. Why should taxpayers fund a bureau of socialist propaganda?

Just under five anxious hours to go. And I reckon you’d need every minute to read all the Herald Sun’s Grand Final preview coverage.
Magnificent effort by everyone at Southbank.
Loudest chortle of yesterday was drawn by a HS Online reader who claimed that in order to get the maximum number of Collingwood supporters watching the Grand Final parade it would be rerouted to go past the Melbourne Remand Centre.

When it comes to disturbing trends in society, we tend to follow the British. So don’t expect any improvement on the law and order front.

Police have lost control of the streets, the forces’ watchdog warns as new figures show that an estimated 14 million incidents of anti-social behaviour take place each year – one every two seconds.

Herald Sun opinionista Andrew Bolt is being sued by a mob of white people for questioning in these two columns their claims to aboriginality.
One of the complainants is a white man who won an award established for black women.
As Tim Blair writes, this should be fun.

Our leaders are such generous people. With our money.

DOZENS of asylum-seekers are cashed up after being locked up, sharing $5.4 million in compensation payouts from taxpayers for injuries they suffered while in detention.