There’s a lot of reports like this out of the Northern Territory. Just wish someone would take pictures.
UFO spooks Show crowd
A BRIGHT light travelling slowly across the sky last night spooked a large crowd of people at a Territory Show.
Aston Villa’s duffer striker Emile Heskey has retired from international football, prompting a flood of jokes from The Sun:
Emile gets a part-time job at a zoo and the keeper, aware of the striker’s reputation for a lack of pace, tells him to take care of the tortoises.
Later the keeper pops to see how Emile is doing and finds him standing by an empty enclosure, sobbing. “Where have all the tortoises gone?” asks the keeper. Emile shrugs and says: “I just opened the door and whoooossh!!!”
It’ll be nice for Emile when he weds Chantelle Tagoe. It’ll make a change to hear “Mrs Heskey” instead of “Heskey misses”.
What a welcoming gesture:
A Minnesota town is outraged over reports that an illegal immigrant was implanted with a penis pump – paid for by taxpayers.
You know you’re on the right track when that nutcase Chuck Windsor is your opponent:
The Prince of Wales has accused climate change sceptics of using ‘pseudo science’ and ‘intimidation’ to stop the world from addressing catastrophic global warming.
Chutzpah doesn’t begin to describe it:
To Protest Hiring of Nonunion Help, Union Hires Nonunion Pickets
So instead, the union hires unemployed people at the minimum wage—$8.25 an hour—to walk picket lines. Mr. Raye says he’s grateful for the work, even though he’s not sure why he’s doing it. “I could care less,” he says. “I am being paid to march around and sound off.”